I don’t know that I agree with that. Why is it short-sighted to live the best life you’re capable of living? Their needs are just as imporant , yes, but their needs are also their own responsibility just as we are responsible for our own needs.

I don’t think relationships require self-sacrifice at all. I think they require healthy boundaries, clear communication, and a willingness to respect and make space for each other’s needs in a way that doesn’t require sacrifice. I’d recommend reading If the Buddha Married by Charlotte Kasl for how to exist as healthy individuals and still manage a healthy partnership. Compromise shouldn’t look like self-sacrifice.

But if we’re not loved, valued, and respected in a relationship (including having a partner who listens to us when we voice concerns), I think it may be time to seek out individual and couples’ counseling to see if the relationship can be saved (and is worth saving). We get this one beautiful life, and we don’t have to settle for relationships in it that aren’t healthy- no matter how long the relationship has lasted.

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