I don’t think men should be looking at giving gifts as an opportunity to get laid. That might be where the sense of dissatisfaction comes in. Gifts should be freely given because we love and appreciate someone and want them to be happy — not so we’ll get something we want from that person.

I don’t agree that Valentine’s Day is just for men to give gifts to women. I’ve always gotten Valentines for the people I’ve dated, and I know other women who do the same. It’s not supposed to be about monetary value. The thoughtfulness is what should be valued.

Also, if you look at the distribution of work in most households, women put in so much unpaid and unrecognized physical and emotional labor including primary child-rearing, cooking, cleaning, and even managing the finances. I think having a day where these women are recognized and made to feel special is a small price to pay for all the work they do to maintain the family and household the rest of the year.

I get where you’re coming from on the commercialism, but there’s another way of looking at this. All of these holidays are opportunities to show gratitude and do something thoughtful that will make someone else happy; it doesn’t have to be about what you buy or how much you spend. There are plenty of ways to celebrate that cost little to no money and yet still manage to convey love, friendship, romance, or just general appreciation. I love to celebrate all the holidays as an opportunity to spend time with those I love and to do things that make me happy because it makes them happy, too.

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